You have been married now for three whole months, and already you are getting asked the question, “So when are you going to have kids?” Whether or not you are ready to have a baby that question can be a little shocking, and overwhelming; especially when you pick up your first book about getting pregnant and you realize just how very little you actually understand about conception.
When my husband and I first decided we wanted to start our family, my first thought was that this was going to be a piece of cake, and we would be parents in no time. Two and a half years later, we finally welcomed out first little one into the world. Through that long and painful journey I learned much about my body, and what exactly it takes to get pregnant.
Here are five things every couple should know when they start planning to grow their family.
1. No guarantees
Just because you think it’s time, doesn’t mean it’s going to happen. On average, it takes a healthy couple one year to conceive. Yes, I am sure you have heard, and probably used the term fertile myrtle. And if you are anything like me, you are pretty certain that everyone except you is exactly that. However, that is not the norm; in fact, those couples are part of the numbers that create the average of one year. Think of all the people who try for two, three, 10 years, or even those who never succeed at becoming pregnant on their own.
2. No magic
It's science — not magic. Knowing and understanding your body is a huge help in getting pregnant. The more you understand what your body is telling you the quicker you are likely to get pregnant.
3. Know your cycle
The average woman’s menstrual cycle is 28 days, not 7. In this cycle you have your three to seven day period. After your period ends, your body begins to prepare itself to release another egg, called ovulation, which generally occurs around 14 days after the first day of your period. Over the next week or so, your body is working hard to make sure that egg is fertilized and makes it safely to your uterus where it will implant itself into your uterine lining. If it is unsuccessful at doing so, you will then have your period again as the uterine wall sheds and cleanses itself to then begin the process once again.
Preparing to become pregnant is just as important as trying to become pregnant. Folic acid is essential in the development of a growing baby. Weeks before you ovulate, your ovaries are trying to decide which egg will be released. The egg that will be released will be the egg that is the most mature. Folic acid helps to mature your eggs and helps to ensure that there would be no birth defects, which usually results in a miscarriage. If the eggs aren’t mature enough the chances of conception are decreased, and the chances of miscarriage and or birth defects are increased.
5. Know how to relax
Don’t think too much about it. This sentence is one of the most annoying things you can hear when you are trying to get pregnant, however, it is very important. Stressing too much about getting pregnant can actually prevent it. So, as annoying as it is can be to hear, relax and don’t stress. Meditation is going to be your best friend. Learning how to feel the stress in your body is key to being able to keep yourself calm, and with meditation or exercises like yoga you can bring peace and serenity into your life that can lower your stress helping to create a better chance of conception.
Learning how to read your body doesn’t happen overnight. It takes a lot of practice, patience, and once again meditation. If you have been trying for over a year, and you feel helpless the best thing to do is see a fertility specialist in your area. It can be overwhelming, but it will be comforting for you to have answers.