My husband and I have always had a pretty healthy relationship. Of course we have our differences and our good share of arguments – For example, I like to wash the dishes before I put them in the dishwasher, where he likes to just put them in the dishwasher and says, “It is called a dish-WASHER for a reason.” I prefer to cuddle all night long while we sleep, where he likes his space after we’ve been asleep for a little while. I am sometimes lazy and just want to hang out, where he likes to be on the move and get things done. (He is a very hard worker!) Every marriage comes with its trials, hard times and bumps … but it is our daily choices that affect how we grow and react to one another.
Often times I find myself taking my relationship with my husband for granted. It isn’t until I hear of a dreadful story on the news or talk to a friend who is unhappy in her marriage, that I realize how blessed I really am and how I need to be more grateful to have a fun partner in life!
I once heard a quote by Robert Brault that says, “Enjoy the LITTLE THINGS in life, for one day you will look back and realize they were the big things.” I think a lot of time in marriages, we become comfortable and let things slide and change. But after bringing a baby into our family, I have learned the importance of the little things and how crucial it is to not let things fall and alter.
I have come up with five LITTLE THINGS that changed my marriage. They are small and simple, but probably the most profound and significant points and things to do to have a successful marriage.
1. Kiss each other when you see each other
Remember when you were dating and how you couldn’t WAIT to see your man? The days seemed like weeks until you got to see him. The time would finally come for you to be together and you would run into his arms and give him a big hello kiss! Do you remember that? Did that happen?
I grew up in a home where my dad kissed my mom hello EVERY single day, without fail, no matter where we were. Kids would be running up and down the stairs, company would be over visiting on the couches, but before he took off his tie or said hello to the visitors – he would head straight to my mom and give her a kiss. Now that I am grown and married, I have learned the importance of these “welcome home kisses.” They really set the mood for the evening. It is always nice to be welcomed home and to feel like you were missed.
There is something about the touch of a hand. It says, I care about you. I need you. I adore you. I love you. I support you. I’ve got you. I’ll catch you. I want you. One of my favorite things is when Tyson grabs my hand when we are walking down the street or at the mall. It may sound silly and simple – but that is what this list is! It is a simple gesture that will take you a long way. Hold hands and hold them tight.
3. Eat dinner together
Life is so busy! Someone needs to be here, but the other person needs to be there, oh and that needs to be done, but first I need to do this. I mean, life gets really crazy. And the larger your family grows, the more activities you have going on, which in return makes for an even BUSIER schedule. I completely understand that eating dinner together EVERY night may not be possible, but I do encourage you to eat dinner together as MUCH as possible. Sit at the dining room table, turn off the TV and TALK. Talk about your day! Laugh together, complain together and listen to one another.
4. Pray together
Every night before we go to bed, we try to pray together. Sometimes we fall asleep on the couch (oops! Shouldn’t admit that!) but we try to go to our bedroom together every night. Before we crawl into bed, we get on our knees and thank our Heavenly Father for the great day that we were blessed with. When you pray together as a couple, you have a connection unlike any other. Not only are you letting God into your marriage, but you get to hear what the other person truly is thinking. I love to hear Tyson pray for me. And I love to pray for him. Some of the most sacred moments in our marriage have been on the side of our bed, kneeling together in prayer.
5. Go to bed together
Like I said, we are guilty of falling asleep on the couch watching TV, but I encourage you to go to bed together. At the same time. One of you may stay awake to read a book, watch a show or cruise social media and that is fine – but I suggest to initially go to bed together. I love the time we have just the two of us each night. When the baby is asleep and we can lay in our bed and just chat. Sometimes we get talking and an hour goes by without us even knowing! That time together is special and creates a true bond between husband and wife.
These five simple things may sound small and easy, but I do know that “through small and simple things, great things are brought to pass.” It really is the little things that matter and if we always remember that, our marriages will be a little healthier and we will be a little happier.
Danielle is a blessed mother to a miracle little girl and a wife to her high school sweetheart. Her blog, Today's The Best Day celebrates the blessing of motherhood and it is her hope to help moms everywhere make every day the best day for their families.