The dangers of revenge

We all experience times of pain, hurt and grief. Unfortunately, many seek revenge as a way to retaliate and help their own pain go away.

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  • As we go through life, we, each, experience events and situations that cause us heartache and grief. We become so upset and discouraged that revenge seems to be the only way to pull us out of our depression. However, revenge is counterproductive. You will cause more damage to yourself than you would if you moved forward and forgot about the incident.

  • As adults, understanding the consequences of revenge can be challenging. For children, it can be even more confusing. Taking the time to teach your children the dangers of revenge are important for when those hurtful and upsetting situations arise. Here are several dangers you and your children should be aware of when seeking revenge.

  • You forget to forgive

  • Revenge is defined as “to exact punishment or expiration for a wrong.” You, and those around you, are not perfect. We all make mistakes, and many mistakes affect other individuals. When you seek revenge, you have a desire to retaliate. You want to punish another individual for her mistake.

  • However, that desire, that retaliation, takes a place in your heart. It takes the place of any forgiveness. It harbors unkind and destructive thoughts. In many situations, when people seek revenge, they forget about forgiveness. They only think about the other individual feeling those same emotions.

  • You can’t turn back time

  • If you seek revenge, you need to think about the consequences following your actions. You can’t turn back time and rewind a large mistake you might make. If you are thinking about revenge, ask yourself these questions.

    • Are you going to cause more hurt and heartache than the initial mistake?

    • Will you destroy one or more relationships?

    • Is revenge worth the price you are about to pay?

  • Revenge is difficult to stop

  • Once you begin to seek revenge, it is difficult to stop. You begin to seek revenge for any individual who hurts or upsets you. You want all individuals who have wronged you to pay the price. Revenge is addicting. It can be satisfying to know the other individual is “punished” for his mistake. However, when you continually seek revenge, you destroy relationships. You slowly destroy your ability to forgive. You become a bitter, hurtful and rude person.

  • You make the healing process more difficult

  • Revenge is usually sought when someone’s feelings are hurt. A study shows that when you seek for revenge, you are continually thinking about the incident, making it more difficult to move on. When you forget about revenge, you think less about what was done to you and who did it. You have an easier time forgiving and letting go.

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  • Revenge is not as sweet as many people may think. It can destroy who you are and the relationships with those you love and care for most. By understanding the dangers of revenge and teaching them to your children, you can help them avoid many mistakes that not only affect their day but who they become, as well.

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Courtnie is an editor for FamilyShare.com and has a degree in journalism. She has a slight obsession with running, newspapers and large fuzzy blankets. She currently lives in Idaho with her husband and two sons.

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