Much has been said of the Seven Deadly Sins in religious dialogue. But do they really affect your marriage? Follow the links below for a discovery of eternal truths that can save your marriage.
Lust is characterized by excessive thoughts of a sexual nature, or uncontrollable, sickening sexual desire. Today there is much talk of sex addiction. Pornography, adultery, fornication or that same uncontrollable sexual desire can destroy your relationship. A healthy sexual relationship is vital in marriage. Make sure your partner is sexually satisfied so that, ultimately, he is not tempted to go out looking for sexual gratification somewhere else or by other means. If in your relationship you do not get enough sex, master your impulses and learn how to ask properly and prepare your partner so she feels the desire to be with you sharing those sacred and intimate moments. Chastity is the opposite of lust.
Sloth is closely tied to its sister, indifference. A mind that is not busy doing something productive is a mind that does not function; it is somewhat ill or null and void. You should not treat your spouse with an attitude of indifference. Fulfill your home and work responsibilities with enthusiasm. When your spouse wants to tell you something, give her your full attention. Find out how she really feels, does she need something? Does she feel sick or hungry? Or does she want to chat or go for a walk? Avoid activities that are just for you, like playing videogames, or surfing the Internet. Your partner will surely also want to spend time with you after so many hours apart from the workday. Diligence is the opposite of sloth.
Gluttony and drunkenness is unnecessary or excessive consumption of food and harmful substances. Alcohol or drugs fall into this category. These practices are addictive and destructive. Alcohol, for example, can lead to acts of violence or other inappropriate behavior that will make you feel terribly ashamed later. None of these excesses will build your self-esteem, on the contrary, they will destroy it and you will lose your self-respect and sense of individual worth. Your spouse, who loves you, will suffer endless hours of loneliness and despair unable to fight a vice that seems invincible. Avoid any excesses, and completely avoid the use of any substance that causes dependency, because this will only lead you to a dead end. Temperance is the opposite of gluttony.
Wrath is also known as anger, rage or hatred. It is a feeling of impatience and intolerance. Do not be angry with your spouse, be patient. Keep in mind that everyone makes mistakes. Face life with a sense of humor and you will see that nothing is as bad as it seemed a moment ago. Learn to control your emotions. Practice meditation, read the Bible or other religious books that brings peace to your soul. Pray to your God, breathe deeply and take a few moments to cool your head when someone says something that irritates you or does something you don't like. Control your tongue. Don't say the first thing that comes to mind. Think carefully before you speak and never ever use violence against your spouse. Remember that violence can be physical, verbal or emotional. A good dose of patience, the virtue opposed to anger, will calm those raging impulses. Patience is the opposite of wrath.
Envy is a harmful emotion that feeds on and enjoys watching the suffering of others. It not only makes you want what someone else has, but also makes you want to deprive another person of what they have. In your relationship you should never belittle your spouse. Treat her as your equal. You must have empathy for her sorrows. You should try to make her happy. If you feel miserable for some reason, do not drag her into the abyss. Be happy for her accomplishments, even if it means you are out of the spotlight for a moment. Charity is the opposite of envy.
Greed is another sin of excess. Greed is the need to acquire material things. If you are the sole provider for your family, it does not mean that all the money is yours and only you can administer it and spend it. If you and your spouse work, do not keep track of individual profits. Put all the wages in a single bank account. This way you will not feel that one contributes more than the other. Do not obsess over making more and more money. You will never feel satisfied with how much you have saved, because you can never get enough of what you don't need. Spend, instead, more time with your spouse. Spend quality time together and enjoy the fruits of your labor. What good is it to gather and save goods and riches and never enjoy them? Generosity is the opposite of greed.
Pride is also known as the mother of all sins. Other synonyms are: arrogance, vanity, insolence and vainglory. It stems from enmity, as explained by the religious leader Ezra Taft Benson. A proud person will never apologize; in a marriage relationship that attitude becomes a deadly weapon. In a relationship where none, or just one of them, is humble enough to ask for forgiveness, with surety will not become a nest of happiness and bliss. Learn to be humble, to love and respect your partner. Control your ego and recognize the excellent abilities, gifts and talents of your spouse. Recognize her efforts to please you. Be a faithful friend and constant companion to the person you promised to spend the rest of your days with. Humility is the opposite of pride.
Amiel Cocco Verbauwen graduated with a Bachelors (BA) in Marketing Communications at Brigham Young University and as professor of piano from the Ibero-Americano Rossini Conservatory. He currently lives in Buenos Aires, Argentina with his wife and two daughters.