4 reasons you should NEVER stop being your husband's best friend

Romance seems to take center stage in most relationships, but friendship is what really keeps your love strong. Here is why being best friends is so important in your marriage.

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  • It is important to not only have romantic feelings for your husband, but also a genuine friendship.

  • A lot of relationships start out as friends, and then develop into something more. That common ground, shared interests, and ability to spend time together helps build a foundation for establishing a relationship for life. Here is why it is important to continue your friendship after you say "I do."

  • 1. You have interests outside of your relationship

  • The first few years of marriage may be focused around each other. You may be fine focusing on learning more about one another, and enjoying that newlywed bliss, but soon the excitement fades, and all that is left is your shared interests and love for each other. If you don't have interests outside of your relationship, then you're at risk of getting bored of each other and seeking other people to spend time with. People that you have similar interests with.

  • Make sure that you have some hobbies and activities that you can do together that you both enjoy. Playing a sport together, sharing a favorite leisurely activity, joining a club or volunteering together. It gives you something to talk about besides each other.

  • 2. You have more than a spouse, but rather a soulmate

  • When you are best friend's with your spouse, your relationship goes much deeper than physical attraction. You feel comfortable enough to share your inner most secrets, your hopes, dreams, desires, and you actually want to spend time together. A friendship involves respect and kindness, not just romance. Without a true friendship, your marriage may grow stale.

  • 3. You can easily be reminded to treat each other as friends

  • Sometimes it is easier to treat your friends better than your family. Most people would never throw a fit, roll eyes, or scream at a friend, yet they find themselves acting this way everyday with their significant other. It is easy to get comfortable with your spouse and get lazy about how you treat them. Just because you got married does not mean you can stop being nice to each other. You should be reminded every once in a while that this person is still your friend, so you should treat them as such!

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  • 4. Looks fade

  • Let's be honest, looks don't always last. Many people marry for looks. They are physically attracted to someone, but may have nothing in common with them. They can look at them for hours, but find it impossible to carry on a conversation.

  • If you establish your relationship based on looks, you will soon learn that looks fade. Maybe not in a year or five, but twenty years from now, your spouse most likely will be a few pounds heavier, have a bit more wrinkles, and perhaps a bit less hair. If you have built your relationship based on friendship, even if looks fade, your love of spending time together will probably not!

  • Friendship is just as important, if not more, than romance. While it is important to work on your romantic relationship as often as you can, you may go through periods where romance is not on your mind 24/7, but being able to have a friend to depend on really helps to keep the flame alive. Your initial attraction may have brought you together, but your friendship is what will make your relationship last.

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Megan Shauri graduated with a bachelors in anthropology and a masters in psychology. She is a mother of twins.

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