It's easy to get comfortable in a relationship. But sometimes when you are too comfortable, you and your partner start to drift apart. Your once sparkling relationship become routine.
Here's how to tell if your husband is drifting away from you:
1. He spends more time away from home and family
A healthy and long-lasting relationship depends on how you and your spouse interact. This means spending time together. If your husband is spending more time with friends and at work, talk with him about changing his habits. Plan date nights and encourage him to come home early so the two of you can spend time together. As you show more interest in his life, he'll start to drift back to you and your family.
Long-term decisions mean commitment, so if he's hesitant to make these decisions, he is drifting away. Before having another child together or buying a new house, first strengthen your commitment towards each other. Support him in his decisions, talk to him about his dreams and share your own. This will help the two of you get on the same page so you can easily make long-term decisions together.
3. Your relationship lacks intimacy
Physical and emotional intimacy are keys to keeping your relationships alive. Try having more substantial conversations with your husband to help your emotional intimacy. If he avoids sex or these deep conversations, talk to him about it.
As you ask him questions and listen carefully to what he has to say, you'll find that he will be more present and active in your relationship.
4. You have robotic conversations with him
If your conversations could be conducted by a computer chat bot, it's time to change things up. Ask him about his day with a unique question. Show him you're really listening by asking questions about the things he talks about. When he asks about your day, share the smallest details. Make your conversations unique and fun. This will help you stay emotionally connected.
5. He's hesitant to share things
A husband and wife should be able to completely confide in each other. If your spouse isn't sharing parts of his life with you any more, first consider how you have treated his secrets or struggles in the past. He'll be reluctant to share if you haven't taken struggles seriously in the past or shared his secrets with your friends.
Also keep in mind that you may not be the reason for his secretiveness. Don't assume he is cheating or he doesn't love you anymore - just ask him why he's been so quiet. There might be another reason.
6. He has a really good female friend
This doesn't mean he is physically cheating, but he may be emotionally cheating on you with a good friend - without realizing it. If he's confiding in a female friend, he might not feel the need to tell you, creating distance in your relationship.
In this kind of situation, confronting him about his emotional affair may not be the best idea. Instead, tell him how you feel when he confides in another woman. Explain how it has created an emotional distance between the two of you; ask him to tell you things instead of her. If he refuses, it's time to make an appointment with a marriage counselor.
Perhaps he criticizes your hair or clothing choice. Maybe he chastises you for something that isn't your fault. No matter what you do, you are always wrong. If your husband is doing this, stop him. Ask why he feels the need to criticize you. Listen to his reasons and make changes together.
Remember: drifting isn't leaving. Your relationship just needs a reset. Both of you need to reestablish the importance of your marriage and your partner. Don't be afraid to change up your routine, address problems head on and seek help. Life is an adventure - but it's better with spouse by your side.
Stacie Simpson is a FamilyShare staff writer. She loves listening to, gathering and sharing stories and advice to help others improve their quality of life. She spends most of her free time with her husband, ballroom dancing, reading and writing.