5 reasons your marriage will never be like the movies

Life's not always like what you see in the movies, and here's 5 reasons why.

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  • Most of us love a good movie. The drama, comedy, love story and especially the happy ending. It's important, however, to understand that they are just movies -they are not real life. It can be easy to get wrapped up in a story and then look at your own life and not help but compare the two. But the truth is, your life will never be like a Hollywood movie. Here are five reasons why.

  • 1. Fights aren't always resolved in 90 minutes

  • Most movies follow this plot "arch": The beginning when you get to know the characters, the middle where a problem occurs, and the ending when the problem is resolved. Life is not like that. Some issues may drag on for days, months or they may never find a resolution. Sometimes problems are completely out of your control. When you fight with your spouse there's not always a dramatic scene where you both realize how wrong you've been and you run into each other's arms.

  • Understanding that all couples fight, all couples have issues and not all fights end in flowers and apologizes in a timely matter is vital to having a successful marriage.

  • 2. You don't have a team of writers telling you what to say

  • It's easy to forget that every word spoken in a movie was planned. Even if an actor does improvise a line, the director spends time deciding if it works in the scene or not. Those writers are paid a lot to make a story interesting, funny, romantic and natural. In real life, you may not always know what to say, or more likely, you may say the wrong thing. Words can hurt and can't be taken back, so carefully choose what you say to your spouse - and understand both of you will say the wrong thing more than once.

  • 3. Looks are deceiving

  • Actors have a lot of money and resources to look their best. They have teams of makeup artists, hair stylists and wardrobe experts to make sure everything is perfect. The average person does not have any of those things. We age and wrinkle, all while our waistbands expand. That's why it's important not to marry for looks alone. If you love someone with your whole heart, those extra pounds and gray hairs will just add to their appeal.

  • 4. Mistakes happen

  • You're not always going to have a perfect life and you can't just call "cut" and start over. Learning how to overcome obstacles, keep trying, and forgive others are steps everyone has to learn in order to have a happy marriage. The road is not always easy, but that's what makes life interesting, challenging and fulfilling.

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  • 5. There are no happily ever afters

  • Most of us expect a happy ending in the movies, but that isn't a given when it comes to real life. You story does not end when you get meet the perfect guy, get married or have a baby. It continues on, and that's a good thing! You will not always have total bliss, but in order to appreciate the bliss, you must experience the heartache.

  • The next time you watch a movie, just enjoy it for what it is - a story. Remember that the best love story is your own. You get to write it and add to it every day. It may not be the most dramatic, there may be things said that you wish you could take back, and the stars may not look like Hollywood heart-throbs, but it is your story, and that's why it is the best one of them all.

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Megan Shauri graduated with a bachelors in anthropology and a masters in psychology. She is a mother of twins.

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