10 things you don't realize are destroying your daughter

Building up your daughter’s self-worth is extremely important, but sometimes the things we do or say are actually tearing it down.

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  • We remember what it's like to be a young girl growing up in this crazy, doubt filled world. There was so much around us that seemed uncertain and scary, but one person you could always count on was your mom. Sure, dad was great too, but let's face it; mom was number one.

  • Now that you have an impressionable daughter you realize how much she looks up to you, which makes you cautious about everything you do or say around her. Although you may be doing the best you can, there may be things that you don't even realize are hurting your daughter.

  • Here is a list of 10 destructive habits you should cease doing around your daughter:

  • 1. Gossiping

  • Although this can seem like a silly one, gossiping is something that children, especially your daughters, can catch on to pretty quickly and start to imitate. Gossiping in front of your daughter lets her know it's OK to talk about people behind their back, and probably in an unfavorable light.

  • As Socrates said, "Strong minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, weak minds discuss people."

  • 2. Focusing too much on outer beauty

  • It is great to teach your daughter to look her best and to feel beautiful, but the harm comes when it's your only focus. Women are often told that their worth is comprised mostly of their looks, and you don't want to contribute to that narrative. Teach your daughter that as important as her appearance is, it's her soul and mind that are just - if not more - important.

  • 3. Being too self-critical

  • As was mentioned before, daughters look up to mothers and often imitate their behavior. If you are constantly critiquing how you look, how much you weigh, how much prettier you wish you were chances are your daughter will too. Try to control the amount of criticism you have towards yourself and teach your daughter to be confident and have self-worth.

  • 4. Trying too hard to be her friend

  • Sometimes as parents we make the mistake of wanting to be friends with our children as well as being their parent. But the truth is you really can't be your daughter's "friend" if you want to be her mom. It's important to make that boundary clear, and in the end your daughter will be grateful.

  • 5. Having harmful media around

  • Harmful media doesn't just mean violent or scary, it can also mean inappropriate and misleading. Remember that your daughter is growing and developing, so to have media with highly suggestive topics or unrealistic beauty standards constantly on can take an effect. Having a filter or positive media can have a more positive impact on your daughter.

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  • 6. Being too controlling

  • Part of being a parent is watching out for your kids and making sure they are safe. But that good intent can also go overboard sometimes, and it's important for your children to feel like you trust them. Set realistic standards and boundaries, and then let them be.

  • 7. Not giving her enough quality time

  • All most children want is your attention and time. Make sure that you take the time to spend quality time with your daughter, before she's the one not wanting to make time for you.

  • 8. Being overly helpful

  • Wanting to help your children is such a great desire, and most of the time they will need your help. But it's also important to let them learn things on their own and to trust that if they come to a problem they can't solve, they will ask for your help.

  • 9. Letting her be on her phone too much

  • It is inevitable that your daughter will have a cellphone and use it almost every hour of the day.What you might not be realizing is allowing her to be on her screens for most of the day is taking her away from other great and important activities that can teach her how to learn or have fun without technology. Try to have "no screen" time with your daughter, such as during family dinners, or for a couple hours a day.

  • 10. Being a little too definitive with gender roles

  • There is nothing wrong with being feminine or talking about the importance of femininity, but it's also important to be careful about saying things like "that's a boy's job" or "that's too manly." Anybody can be anything they want to be, and it's important to teach your daughter that. Parenting is never easy, and most parents have to learn as they go.

  • Remembering to avoid these 10 destructive things when it comes to our daughter will help to raise her in the best way possible. We all need a little help, and the Dove Channel gives you that help with the ability to control the content that your family sees. Dove Channel provides you with wholesome, entertaining content and a rating system you can rely on.

  • Get your free one month trial today to give your daughter, and the rest of your family members, the type of media that will influence them for the good.

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Tamsyn Valentine is part of the content team at FamilyShare.com. She graduated with a degree in communication with an emphasis in public relations and journalism.

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