You have been so busy with the kids, PTA meetings, book club and your job that you haven't taken the time to talk to your husband. You hope he hasn't noticed, or that he has been too busy himself to feel any neglect, but you can't help but wonder, "Does he need me?"
It can be hard to tell if your husband needs more attention, but here are eight signs to help you know for sure.
1. He stopped asking you for things
You may think that this is a good thing at first, but it actually is quite the opposite. Research has proven that when a man is stressed, he retreats and refrains from being direct with you. "If he doesn't feel like you'll understand what's important to him or that you'll default to a negative response, he'll stop bringing it up," says Greer.
2. He is spending a lot of time with friends
Of course he has friends and work companions that he likes to see on occasion. But he is spending more and more time with them and less at home with you and the family. He is not doing this to get away from you! He is actually seeking your attention and hoping for an invitation to come home and be with you.
3. He has gained weight
All men gain weight once they are married, right? Wrong. When men gain weight, it has been found to most likely be caused by stress, depression, a difficult trial or a divorce. This is because in those moments of defeat, they do not feel attractive which gives them more incentive to indulge in what they think will help them cope: food. If you notice your husband taking a few extra trips for ice cream, maybe you should evaluate how much quality time you have spent together recently.
4. You know your kid's SSNs but can't remember your husband's birthday
This is on you, ladies. Your husband gets jealous of all the time you spend with your kids and it is likely justified. After all, he was the first one to receive the special attention and care you have likely been giving to your children for the past few years. Is this fair to your husband? He needs your love as well.
5. He is constantly telling you how much he misses you
You live in the same house and see each other every single day, but he still often tells you he misses you. This is a clear sign that he needs more love from you. He is working so hard to provide for you and the family, but wants to know that when he comes home he will be welcomed with open arms, a kiss from his loving wife and maybe even a surprise romantic evening.
6. He accuses you of not loving him enough
Has your husband ever told you that you don't love him enough? Oftentimes women forget that their husbands have needs as well. This ranges from physical all the way to emotional. One of the best ways to address this concern is to ask questions and search for understanding. Listen to him. Talk to him. He needs your full attention on him immediately.
7. He talks you out of doing things with friends to be with him
All you want to do is have a night with your bestie you haven't seen in over a year, but he tries to convince you to stay with him. This is not because he doesn't like your friend; it is actually quite the opposite. He is jealous of how special your relationship is with her. When he acts out like this, it is because he feels you aren't spending enough time with him. You aren't treasuring him which is all he wants.
8. He makes you feel bad for the little things
His temper is high, and his patience is low. Everything you do seems to put him on edge. Is he really mad at you? One of the ways men cope with this feeling of being neglected is through anger. He isn't mad at anything you have done; he just misses spending time with you.
Make time for your husband. He loves and misses you dearly. Just a small gesture of appreciation - a surprise special evening together - can go a long way.
Tana is a student with a passion for words. She believes that written words can touch people in ways unimaginable. In her spare time she enjoys singing, hiking, cuddling in a fuzzy blanket, and spending time with her friends and family.