Don't we all wish there was a guidebook that lays out the specific steps you should take to get over the emotional roller coaster breaking up with someone inevitably straps us into? A guide that describes how to weather and channel your volatile emotions to your benefit? An insider's guide to getting over the man that broke your heart?
Listed below are eight tips and guidelines to help you control your ever-changing emotions and get over your heartbreak faster.
1. Cut ties
It is tempting to stay in touch with your once-lover. Your innocent concern and desire to check in and see how he and his family are doing is kind. But, in reality, ties must be cut off for both his and your well-being.
Showing interest in a man that dumped you will only develop self-loathing and low self-esteem. Distancing yourself from his life will help you develop an interest in your own new, exciting life.
2. Set aside coping time
Breaking ties and bonds with a man you once adored and cared for deeply is extremely taxing emotionally. Bottling up emotions and feelings can create a volatile bubble that is constantly threatening to burst. Set aside a specific amount of time, preferably right after the breakup, to cope and let all of your feelings erupt.
Feel all of your feels: Allow yourself the time to cry, scream, question and rant. Once your time is up, look yourself in they eye and tell yourself it is time to move on.
3. Move on ... literally
Strap on your sneaks and hit the road running. Turn on all of your feel-good music and run till you think you can't run anymore. Clear your mind as you focus on your heartbeat instead of your heartbreak. Move.
Mix it up! Find a new set of songs to listen to. Odds are the two of you had songs that reminded you of each other or songs you enjoyed rocking out to in the car together. So remind yourself it is out with the old and in with the new.
Find a new way to express yourself by creating a list of fresh tunes to help you get your mind off things.
5. Spend time with yourself
Take this time to date and hang out with yourself. Find what sets your soul on fire. Discover which foods you like to make and eat. Find a hobby that consumes your mind and body. Set your heart on developing and creating the best you, and you will discover you are better off without him.
6. Spend time with your girlfriends
Girls just want to have fun. And now that you are not tied down, all of your single girls are ready to reconnect and hang out. Take advantage of the vibrant energy single life has to offer.
In a digital age as savvy and cutthroat as today, posting on social media after a breakup has turned into a bitter and desensitizing game. It is a ploy to showcase that you can move on and find happiness quicker than your ex.
Forget the games and stay off social media!
Take a break from posting and plotting. Instead, take the digital vacation your heart needs and focus on the individuals personally reaching out to you via text, through phone calls or in person. Find happiness in those that are directly related to you, and you will find social media cannot define your post-breakup happiness.
8. Do not blame yourself
If there is one thing you take away from this article, let it be this: Do not blame yourself.
Things may not have worked out the way you had originally planned, but that does not mean things do not happen for a reason. You are brave, kind, intelligent and capable. The end of your relationship is inviting a brand new beginning. Learn from your past and get ready for a brighter future.