The important reasons you need to be a wife first and mother second

It’s not a game or a prize; but rather, putting your marriage first means the entire family wins.

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  • Remember that time when it was just you and your husband, two crazy kids in love, against the world?

  • I am sure you do — as I do, because that's actually the state of life I'm in right now.

  • All that is about to change, however, because we are expecting our first child.

  • During our pregnancy I have noticed a shift in our relationship, especially on my part, to having everything revolve around the baby and less around him and I and our relationship; and it's got me thinking about where my priorities really lie.

  • I have seen mothers — even my own mother — get so caught up in their children that their husbands always seem to be a tag-along rather than the main event.

  • I know it must be difficult to raise children and be a doting spouse, but I also feel that it is important to make your marriage the No. 1 priority in your life.

  • At times this may mean you have to be a wife first and a mother second; but here are some reasons why I believe this is the best thing you can do for your kids, your husband and yourself.

  • He really did come first

  • Your relationship with your husband is the key component of what created your beautiful family in the first place. It will also be what sustains it and helps it to thrive for as long as possible.

  • A loving mother and father who also love each other deeply is what every child deserves and needs; and you can have that by devoting essential time to the most special man in your life.

  • Your children will notice

  • One thing I admired about my parents' relationship growing up was that they made the effort to go on a date every week. Even though I was very young, it is something I will always remember.

  • Children notice a lot more than we think, and they notice the kind of relationship you have with your husband. By putting him and your marriage on the top of your list, it shows the kids that this is the kind of relationship you should have with your spouse. It also gives them comfort that the chances of their parents staying together are very high, which is actually very important to their physical and emotional health.

  • You can't be a good mother if you aren't a good wife

  • Let's be honest — when one thing is off in our lives it affects everything else. Same goes for the relationship with your husband; if that is off in any way it will inadvertently effect how you interact with your children and how you mother them.

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  • Do yourself and your children a favor by building a strong and united relationship with your husband. Not only will you and him feel the love and benefit from this, but your children will too.

  • Nobody is perfect, and it can be very hard to juggle being a wife, mother and any other role that you may have. Your husband and your children don't expect you to be perfect; but giving your very best effort to have a good relationship with your husband and make him a priority in life will be the best thing you can do for your family.

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Tamsyn Valentine is part of the content team at FamilyShare.com. She graduated with a degree in communication with an emphasis in public relations and journalism.

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