Guy and girl meet. They fall madly in love. Then one magical day he gets down on one knee and asks this girl, the love of his life, if she will take his hand in marriage. They get married, and live happily ever after.
Kind of, but kind of not.
Throughout our lives there are many things we hear, see, and learn about marriage. From our own parents, the movies- there are many contributing factors that form our view of how marriage really is.
The reality is because every person is different, every marriage will also be, but there are definitely some marriage myths that need to be dispelled for the sake of those wanting to get married.
Here are 7 marriage myths, and the truths to dispel them, which we need to know to have a happy and successful marriage.
1: If we have a perfect wedding, we will have a perfect marriage
The truth is this idea is horribly wrong. First off, what even is a perfect wedding? Is it a lavish party with hundreds of your closest friends and family? An intimate get together where you share your love?
Again the truth is your entire marriage shouldn't be dependent on the type of wedding you have, because that is only one night of the rest of your lives.
2: After we are married, everything will magically work out
Truth is that marriage is only the beginning of a new life, not the end of an old one.
You will still have jobs to work, bills to pay, and problems to solve. Except now, you have a wonderful partner at your side to help you work it all out. But marriage is work, and it's not going to be rainbows and butterflies every day.
3: Marriage will complete me
Truth is it probably won't. Those insecurities and self-doubts that you had before you were married will follow you straight through to marriage.
Marriage is not that time to take care of your issues, because there are so many that you and your husband will have to face together. Take the time before you get married, even before you are in a serious relationship, to become a whole person who knows and accepts every part of themselves. Trust me; your husband, and your marriage, will thank you for it.
4: I need to be a perfect wife or a perfect husband all the time
The truth is, once again, that there is no such thing as perfection. Hopefully by now you and your husband have seen every side of each other: the grumpy, the fun, the sad, and the just-woke-up side.
Marriage isn't a magical land where there are only good days and not stressful or sad days. Marriage means loving every part of your spouse and accepting them at face value, whatever kind of day they are having.
5: My husband or wife should know what I want/need so I don't need to tell them
Truth is that no one is a mind reader. Yes, they may know you very well but no, that doesn't mean they magically always know what you want or need.
No one likes a guessing game, and making your marriage one is not a good idea. Always be open and honest with your spouse and you will be stronger and better for it. Marriage means constant, and I mean CONSTANT, communication.
6: He/She doesn't give me compliments and tell me they love me all the time so something must be off.
Truth is that just because they don't constantly hug and kiss you and tell you they love you doesn't mean there is anything wrong at all.
The reality is that when you get married you begin to get more and more comfortable with each other, meaning you don't feel the need to constantly reassure each other how you feel.
Of course you should still tell your spouse how much you love them as much as possible, but also don't overthink or over analyze when they don't do it every hour or every day.
7: We were great communicators before we were married, so we don't have to work on our communication skills after we get married
Truth is communication is a skill that needs to be consistently and constantly worked on.
Marriage will teach you communication skills you never thought you had and ones that you never thought you needed. This also means that marriage is also a time to learn and grow together and separately, and you should never think that there isn't more you can do to improve and help it.
These aren't all the myths and truths about marriage, but they are some pretty important ones. Take to heart some of these truths and make sure to dispel all of the myths, and enjoy all the happiness that comes from the best part of your life.