4 lessons I absolutely have to learn before having children

My secret confession for my children may be the same as yours.

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  • I haven't had children yet, but I do think about them. If I were to be straightforward and honest with my future kids, I wouldn't lie to them. I wouldn't tell them I can't wait for the sleepless nights and I'm thrilled for all the messes.

  • Instead, I would tell them something they really need to know. And they'll need to know it more than once in their life.

  • I'd tell them my confession: I'm scared.

  • Yes; I've had big fears about having children, and you may have them too. I've never been a mother (I'm not even a wife yet). But when I get worried, I try to think of these four things about my future children that help take the fear away:

  • Children make you happier

  • Any parent will tell you that this is true. Yes, kids can be messy, loud and annoying at times, but children will increase your happiness. You'll be able to share in their joy, comfort them when they're sad, and be a hero in their eyes. You'll find yourself bragging about them on accident and thinking about them when your mind wanders.

  • Children make you work hard

  • Maybe you're a pro at full-time office work, but having children will make you work in an entirely new way. You'll become a teacher, cheerleader, chauffeur, chef, conflict mediator, and full-time snuggler. You will clean up messes that will appear five minutes later. You'll be up late into the night and you will work harder than you ever have before. And that hard work will pay off immensely.

  • Children make you laugh

  • You'll be able to have a comedian around 24 hours of the day. You'll constantly want to write down the hilarious things your child says or does. And you'll find yourself repeating the things your child said to your spouse at the end of the day.

  • Children will have yours and your spouse's features

  • If your daughter has your eyes, or your son has his smile, then you lucked out. When you can see yourself or your spouse in your child, you'll better remember how happy you are to have children. And the compliments from others will definitely help. As they grow, you'll be able to compare younger photos of yourself to your child. Maybe your child even looks like your parents when they were that age!

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  • Maybe you're like me and you haven't had kids yet, or you're just starting out. Every day is something new, and every day is your chance to either live in fear or in happiness. Some days will be naturally difficult, and there may be nothing you can do. But when you see your son or daughter softly falling asleep and you remember the blessing your children are in your life, you'll be able to face the next day with a bigger smile.

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Jenna Koford is on the content team at FamilyShare. She graduated with a degree in Communications—Journalism and a minor in editing. Jenna enjoys painting and calligraphy, planning a wedding, and Pinterest and Netflix.

Website: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennkofe

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