You and your darling are happy together… but are you trying too hard to have that happiness? No relationship is perfect, but every relationship is a two-way street. Are you doing all the work to make it work?
Watch out for these signs that you are:
Playing the initiation game
If you are always the one to block out weekends for a movie or constantly sending every "how's your day going" text, it's time to reevaluate. He might have a busy schedule, but that doesn't mean it comes down to you to be the one to initiate every date night, or to find time to spend together. In a healthy relationship, both partners should work to schedule time to be with each other.
When you do spend time together, are you doing what you want? Feeling the need to only do what your partner loves means you both aren't compromising in your relationship. Being in a happy and functional relationship means trying out new things together, but he should be as interested in your hobbies as much you are interested in his.
The rationalization queen
Constantly making excuses for your beau in order to hide how you are feeling, or what's really going on, is a big red flag. It's normal to be frustrated or upset at times, but consistently rationalizing his behavior to your friends and family means it's time to get to the root of the problem. You shouldn't have to feel stuck in any relationship you are in.
Playing hide and seek (with yourself)
No one is 100% authentic on the first few dates, but after dating for a while, you should be able to feel like yourself around your honey. Feeling like you can't honestly be yourself in a relationship means it's not worth staying with that person.
Yes, yes & yes
Any relationship needs give and take to survive, which may mean you order Chinese instead of going out for Mexican on occasion. Its fine to not always get what you want if it makes your honey happy, but that also means your darling has to do the same for you. If you are constantly agreeing just to make your partner happy, that needs to change. You deserve to have someone agree with you instead of being the sole people-pleaser in your relationship.
Constantly worried if you should send that text, or ask him to come to your work party, shouldn't be a part of your relationship. Of course there are some pre-dating jitters of not wanting to come on too strong, but if you are dating, you shouldn't be afraid to ask your honey how their day went via text.
Living in fear of a seemingly impending break up is not the way to feel in a relationship. Doing just that makes you feel like every word you say could possibly tip him over the edge and break up with you. There needs to be a level of happiness and confidence in any functioning relationship; fearing any little thing could cause the breakup is no way to live.
Being unhappy with your man is difficult to see if you can't even imagine being happy with someone else. If you are trying too hard to make him happy and not feeling happy in return, it's time to move on.
"I'm free whenever"
A glaring issue in any relationship is being too available. Yes, you want to spend time with your beau, but if they aren't doing the same for you, it is time to move on. Don't radiate insecurities by feeling like you can't say no.
Any relationship is going to take effort on your part, but if you are the one who is always available, constantly saying "yes," or rationalizing everything, it's time to reevaluate.
Emily is putting her English and Humanities degree to use editing and writing all over the world. Trying to see all 7 world wonders (while visiting as many countries as she can in between), Emily loves wandering alleyways, beautifully photographed food, stumbling upon impromptu flea and food markets. She can usually be found camera in hand, munching on a street food and never has her headphones out of reach.