Why I don’t need marriage

Marriage isn’t a need. It's absolutely essential.

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  • I was married on April 11, 2015 to my best friend, and it was the best day of my life.

  • This year I have learned so much about this man I love, and about myself.

  • I've always been a very independent person. I'd always had people I cared about and loved to be around, but I never felt that I really, absolutely, needed someone in my life.

  • That was until I met my husband.

  • In this past year of marriage I learned that I have flaws and he has flaws; but together we make a perfect pair. We have experienced love, heartbreaks, stress, and overwhelming joy.

  • In reflecting upon this last year and my life before and after marriage, I have come to the conclusion that I don't just need marriage; it is something that is absolutely essential in my life.

  • Here are some reasons that I believe marriage is absolutely essential both for individual people and for society as a whole, and why everyone should eventually find somebody to share the rest of their lives with.

  • Turning "I" into "We"

  • We live in a world of "I"; meaning that everything revolves around an individual's needs rather than anyone else's. This type of self-gratification is satisfying in the moment, but it never lasts. When a person is married and decides to share everything with someone else, "I" turns into "We." "We" means asking another what they want or need, and them asking you in return. "We" means taking more time to think things out; eliminating the extraneous and erroneous. "We" means smarter and better choices.

  • A more satisfied life

  • The American Family Survey, a nationally representative online poll of 3,000 American adults by the Deseret News and BYU's Center for the Study of Elections and Democracy, asked married couples, co-habitating couples and single individuals how satisfied they were with their lives. The responses found that over 80 percent of married couples reported being very satisfied with their lives compared to only 57 percent and 53 percent for the other two groups.

  • Partners in all

  • Having someone you can rely on for everything is not only a necessity, but a blessing. Life is not easy, and tends to throw us many curveballs. Having a spouse who can support you and uplift you, and vice-versa, makes those curveballs much easier to bear.

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  • More than a need

  • Marriage is so much more than a need to be fulfilled. Marriage is essential for happiness, and not just the temporary kind; the long-lasting, ever-fulfilling kind. Marriage is a chance to serve someone every day; to think about their needs before you own, to be kind, to learn to communicate and to handle conflict. Marriage makes you and your spouse better people, and teaches you skills that can't be learned anywhere else.

  • Marriage is a ripple effect that can create long-lasting and stronger relationships, which can only create more long-lasting, stronger families. It is something that is not always easy to get to, but it is extremely worth it.

  • This is why you don't only need marriage; it is absolutely essential.

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Tamsyn Valentine is part of the content team at FamilyShare.com. She graduated with a degree in communication with an emphasis in public relations and journalism.

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