Whether big or little, marriage problems are there, always waiting for the best (or worst) moment in our lives to jump on stage. When you are someone's spouse, problems are almost a daily part of our lives. What couple doesn't argue every now and then because of differences? What husband and father doesn't worry about providing for his family? What wife and mother isn't worried about housework or a sick child?
If problems are seemingly unavoidable, how can you maintain harmony in your marriage despite adverse circumstances? Maybe you have a strategy, perhaps not. You may feel that everything is under control, or maybe feel that everything is out of control. Whatever your perspective, the Bible sets up three principles to keep in mind and practice so you and your partner can emerge victorious from all these unpleasant moments. If you and your spouse commit to each principle, you will realize they are easily implemented in your daily life. You both will also discover the happiness that can be found in the problems you face.
1. Learn to see God even in the most difficult times
The psalmist David said: "I foresaw the Lord always before my face, for he is on my right hand, that I should not be moved" (Acts 2:25). David was a person with many problems, like any of us, but he continued on, knowing that God is always there. If you always keep God in mind, you will overcome all the things that could make your heart break and overwhelm your soul. You will find happiness. Of course that faith doesn't make things less difficult; rather, faith makes difficult things become possible. Having faith in God reminds you and your spouse that you both are not alone in your trials.
2. Learn to be happy and think about all the good
A wise proverb says, "A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones." (Proverbs 17:22). The kind of thoughts you have determine what you say and what you do. If your problems overwhelm you, and you begin to dwell on negative thoughts, you will not see the solution that could be right in front of you. Negativity blinds and deafens your senses and can lead to despair and ruin. However, positive thoughts reduce frustration and discouragement. A happy heart makes you look younger, leaves you better equipped to solve problems, and creates a springboard to overcome obstacles and achieve your goals sooner. Finding happiness in every situation in your marriage will lead to success and peace in times of turmoil.
3. Learn to strip yourself of pride and put your life in God's hands
The apostle Paul said the following to a group of afflicted people: "Be careful for nothing; but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God" (Philippians 4: 6). There are things that are out of control and cannot be understood, but still we insist on being prideful. Instead, you and your spouse should decide to have trust in God. When we do so, we can find peace in Him and His plan for us. As a couple, decide on a time each day where you can pray, mediate and think about how God can help you through your problems. Not only will you find peace and confidence, you will grow together as a couple.
Together, these three lessons teach us all that every problem is an opportunity to be better, to grow, to mature, to understand that you can get through anything. Do not fear the multitude of problems each marriage faces, instead, decide to face them with faith in God.