6 ways you are being an awful wife and don't even know it

Without even meaning to, you may be destroying your marriage.

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  • People get married expecting to live a lifetime or more together, but so often, relationships become damaged and the marriage ruptures. So if people get married with the aim of staying together, why do they so often fall apart?

  • Clearly, people are unintentionally doing things that cause friction in their relationships, and you might be doing these things as well.

  • Here are 6 things many wives do that destroy their marriages:

  • 1. You're not putting your husband first

  • After your kids are grown up, after you're retired, you will still be in a relationship with your spouse. Your marriage is the only thing that you can rely on, and you should cherish it in that way.

  • Awful wives allow hobbies, friends, parents, career or kids to push their husbands into second place in your life. Marriage is too challenging to be successful if you're not making your husband your top priority; put your husband first.

  • 2. You allow him to look at pornography

  • Many wives are comfortable with their husbands looking at pornography - some couples even watch it together - but this is destroying your marriage.

  • See, the porn industry uses the complications of real love as a market for their product. In other words, pornographers know that love and sex aren't perfect so they create a fictional world of perfect "love."

  • Imperfections are edited out; the characters don't have bad days, and no matter what one person does to the other, they are made to look like they are having a fabulous time. But this isn't real and it can cause you to be unsatisfied with what is real: your relationship with your spouse.

  • In fact, studies show that pornography causes people to be less attracted to their partners, less satisfied with their love life, and more likely they are to feel alone in their relationships and see their partner as an object. So at the end of the day, condoning sexually explicit material can ruin your relationship.

  • 3. You deny him physical affection

  • It's okay if you don't always feel like having sex, but it can become an issue if you repeatedly withhold sex from your husband. Over time your husband may see this as less love because he needs that closeness to know that you love him.

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  • Physical intimacy is a major thing that sets your relationship with your husband apart from every other relationship you have. Make sure that you cultivate this special relationship with your husband.

  • 4. You are "reading his mind"

  • You might not know your husband as well as you think you do. When you assume that you know what he's thinking or feeling, you cut off communication with him. If you catch yourself interpreting something your husband says or does in a negative light, take a step back and ask him to clarify it.

  • Likewise, don't be surprised if your husband doesn't know you as well as you think he does. Don't expect him to know what you want or how you feel when you don't express it.

  • Old couples have learned to read each other's minds through years of communication. If you don't expect to have that superpower now, maybe you'll actually have it in the future.

  • 5. You are emotionally cheating

  • Awful wives share secrets with men other than their husbands, keep relationships hidden from their husbands, dress to attract someone who is not their spouse, and sacrifice time to be with this other person. Believe it or not, these are all ways you can cheat on your husband. You can be unfaithful to your spouse even without doing anything physical with someone else.

  • With regards to relationships with others (especially men), it's better to err on the safe side rather than risk entering into dangerous territory and destroy your marriage.

  • 6. You're pessimistic

  • Many couples don't get to spend much time together on a daily basis. With all there is to do with jobs, hobbies, kids, etc. it can be hard to devote time to each other every day. Because your husband is your main confidant, you may want to use the time you do have to unload all the things that aren't going too great. However, if you use the only time you have together as an opportunity to vent all your negativity, your relationship also becomes negative.

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  • When you're with your husband, try to focus on the positive so that your relationship doesn't turn negative.

  • Please note: Relationships involve 2 people, so while this advice is directed to women, it applies to men as well.

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Melinda Fox has a bachelor's degree in English and is the Sponsored Content Manager for FamilyShare.com. She loves Shakespeare, listening to her favorite songs on repeat and journaling.

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