As mothers, we will always remember our children as though they were still little enough to snuggle up on our laps. Even if they are old enough to have kids themselves, it's hard to let go of those memories.
Now, as I see my own son all grown up right before my eyes, I realize I'll never be quite as prepared as I'd like to be for him to take the next step in life … It doesn't seem like he is old enough! But the thought of him succeeding makes me smile. Though he will always be my little boy, I want him to have a happy life and a happy marriage.
Here are some things every son needs to hear from his mother before getting married:
Love and value your wife
As a husband, you have an important role in your marriage — but so does your wife. Never underestimate the value of your wife. She will be the queen of the home you create together. Love her, always respect her, provide support, and be forever grateful to her. She will carry your children. She will be your children's mother. Treat her with the highest level of love and respect. Your role is important too; managing, providing for and protecting your family will help you and your wife have a happy marriage.
Have eyes only for your wife
When you decide to marry, know that you are making a serious commitment. Marriage means staying together as friends and lovers through the ups and downs of life. Your wife will be your best friend as much as she will be your wife. Marry someone who can be both. Of course, you both will have other friends in your lives, but your spouse will be the one you always turn to. Never talk to your wife in a way that makes her doubt your love. Never give her a reason to think you are being unfaithful. Love her and her only.
Support her goals
While we should all have individual goals, it is important to share goals with your partner. It is also important that you support your wife's goals. As you start your marriage, both of you will have similar goals. From getting married to starting a family or moving into a bigger house, there will be many goals you share. Decide to share goals, but also decide to support your wife in her own achievements.
Enjoy your (alone) time together
When you first marry, you will have time for each other, but that may change as work schedules collide and children come along. While time should be spent together as a family, it is crucial you spend time alone with your wife. Don't let go of the deep discussions you have earlier in your marriage. Continue to date your wife even after you are married. Be romantic, and ask her all those silly personal questions you did when you first met. A woman in love is a confident woman! Give her that love and confidence by spending time with her.
Do not let anyone intervene in your decisions. Obviously, opinions from friends and family should be considered, but at the end of the day, you and your wife should have the final say. Don't feel pressured by others and don't let others choose where life takes you. Though friends and family might try to intervene, it is your family who will live with the consequences of your decisions. Make sure you and your wife are on the same page.
Establish patterns in your home
While you shouldn't always need to ask your wife's permission to do things, setting limits and rules from the beginning of your marriage will set a standard for both of you to live by. Remember, you are partners in this adventure called life. You are in it together. Decide to live your life a certain way. Talk about the things you expect from your life together. Set up a way of life early on in your marriage. Know how expenses will be paid, how children will be raised, and how time will be spent. When you both agree, there will less friction and frustration in your home.
Have God in your life
Keep in mind that your home should be a little slice of heaven. God should be present. Your home should be a place where harmony, love and charity thrive. Kneel together in prayer to tell God how grateful you are. Ask for help making decisions. Ask for guidance.
You are so unique, and you need to share your individual personality. Don't hide yourself from the world. Make yourself known for admirable qualities like honor, strong work ethic, trust in God, and solid morals. Your wife will love you for it, and you will have confidence and pride in the things you do each day.
As mothers, we must prepare our children to grow and form their own families. Don't let this chance go to waste. Though it's hard to see your boy grow up, it is a perfect opportunity to teach him how to be happy in his marriage. Plus, we all know that when our kids are happy, we are happy. Take the time to give this advice to your son so he can start his own life with your support and wisdom.
This is an adaptation and translation of the original article "Hijo mío, no te cases." It has been republished here with permission.