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Everyone gets annoyed, and everyone is annoying. If you find your hubby is making your crazy, maybe the problem isn't him.
In their book "Annoying," science writers Joe Palca and Flora Lichtman speculate that those who are frequently annoyed may be frequently annoying. One way you can make your husband's quirky qualities less annoying is to change your annoyance threshold. Another way is to put a positive spin to some of your husband's annoying habits.
Here are a few of his less-than-lovely habits that you should absolutely love:
Your husband is obsessed with sports
If you don't care for sports or are bothered by having to compete with professional athletes for your husband's attention, keep in mind that an affinity for sports develops an appreciation for teamwork, loyalty and dedication—all good qualities in a mate when properly harnessed.
He works too much
His drive to succeed at work is usually linked to his desire to care and provide for you. A recent survey shows that 87 percent of people are unsatisfied with their job. Unless he's in the 13 percent, one of the big reasons he keeps punching the clock is so he can be your hero and provider. Make sure he knows you appreciate the effort.
Your man channel surfs
Men have a knack for filtering out unimportant information from commercials to small talk. His constant contact with the remote control might be unsettling, but it's because he knows what he wants. His ability to focus on his goals helps him get things done.
He doesn't help around the house
If that's your perception, you likely need to widen your horizons of what is defined as "the house." Maybe he doesn't vacuum often, but does he maintain the car or mow the lawn or manage the money or kill the spiders? All of these are important jobs. How you divide household chores is up to you as a couple, but a woman will be wise to acknowledge there are many compartments in the thing we call "a house." When men know what is expected of them, they will do it. Give him a hint if you need some help. He will fail miserably at guessing what you want them to do.
Well, yes there's that. But aside from thinking about sex — which experts say men can do at any time — your husband probably does better focusing on one task before moving on to the next. "Filtering out distractions helps us to achieve things we couldn't otherwise do. Like making fire," says Dr. Gijsbert Stoet. He also said without women's ability to multitask, our species wouldn't survive. Make the most of these complementary qualities.
Your man doesn't know when to quit
Perhaps it's because of their alpha-male programming, but men tend to be determined and persistent. It's a good quality for hand-to-hand combat. It's also good for setting and achieving goals. Be sure you're involved in the goal-setting process and let his tenaciousness work for your relationship instead of against it.
He has no emotions
A more accurate statement would be your husband doesn't often let his emotions show. Men tend to be analytical problem-solvers. They identify the target; they strike the target. Boom. Boom. Just like that. Sometimes a dispassionate response can calm a situation that would otherwise get out of hand.
Caring for each other means looking past the qualities that irk us and seeing the good in each other. Even though men and women are different, we have a human responsibility toward each other. Whether it's the vulnerable in our community, the poor and the hungry on the other side of the globe or our spouse. Doing good for the world starts at home. Pope Francis recently said, "Although the human race has come to understand the need to address conditions that menace our natural environments, we have been slower to recognize that our fragile social environments are under threat as well. It is therefore essential that we foster a new Human Ecology."
For more insights on strengthening your marriage, visit Humanum.it