5 types of men you should probably avoid if you don't want to end up miserable

Avoiding these types of men can preserve you for the happiness you deserve with your future mate. No matter how alluring they may be in other ways, guard yourself from getting caught in their traps.

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  • 1. He's dashingly handsome but not very smart

  • Sometimes those good looks can be deceiving. Handsome doesn't go very far when it comes to having to pay the rent, unless he lands the lead in a hit movie, but if he's not too smart he won't be able to learn the lines so don't count on that. However, if you find a guy who is both handsome and smart, then grab him quick and consider yourself a lucky girl. But wait, how can you tell if he's smart? Here are a few clues:

  • He has at least some higher education — academic or technical — that has or is preparing him for productive employment.

  • He can carry on an intelligent conversation with you about world and national events.

  • He's wise with his money. Not a penny pincher, but smart about paying his bills and saving in case economic hard times hit.

  • 2. He's lazy

  • The odds are if he's lazy now, he'll be lazy after you marry him. If you think you have the power to turn on his latent work genes, you are sadly mistaken. What you see is what you get. Wise women who are looking for the right man to marry have been watching what has happened to their friends and the men they married. If a man is not motivated to work hard now, that's a sure sign he needs to be passed over by you. The ability and desire to consistently earn a paycheck is one of a good man's most desirable qualities.

  • 3. He drinks too much

  • This can be a disaster. If he can't control his drinking now, he's on the way to becoming a debilitated drunk later. Is that what you want? Read up on the behavior of men who drink too much and you'll find divorce courts full of the women they abuse. This applies to those who are addicted to drugs as well. Avoid these kinds of men vehemently.

  • 4. He makes you feel less than adequate

  • If he's always criticizing you and finding fault with the way you do things, that's a huge red flag. If the man you're with doesn't make you feel of worth, ditch him quick. Run, don't walk. Whatever he's doing to you now will only increase in the future. Too many women have become doormats to domineering men who make themselves feel powerful by diminishing their mates. A good man will praise you, be proud of you for your accomplishments, and rejoice in the good that is happening in your life. You will become more because of how he treats you. That's what good mates do for each other.

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  • 5. He is disrespectful to his mother and others

  • It has been said that it's a good idea to look at how a man treats his mother because there is a high probability that this is how he will be treating you in the long term. If the man you are attracted to is disrespectful to others, no matter how he treats you now, later you will become one of his disrespected victims. Sometimes a guy can shine when he's dating—put on a fancy front to impress you—then the true colors come out when you're in a more committed relationship. Don't let his actions fool you. Just know that if he treats others, especially his mother, disrespectfully, that's how he's likely going to treat you as time goes on.

  • No fixer-uppers

  • Too many women get caught up in the I-can-fix-the-bad-boy mode. Avoid that trap like the plague. Don't marry a fixer-upper. It doesn't work. Date guys who are already in the groove of being a good guy. If you are in the good-girl groove yourself, you have a far better chance of attracting the good guys. Be the kind of quality person you want your man to be.

  • There is someone for everyone in this world. By setting your standards high and clear, you can be sure to find a partner who provides all of the good things you will love and none of the bad.

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Gary Lundberg is a licensed marriage and family therapist. Joy is a writer. Together they author books on relationships.

Website: http://garyjoylundberg.com

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