His dog or you? Things to keep in mind if you think Bonzo is usurping your position

He loves you, of that there is no doubt. He takes you everywhere. And right there in the front seat is his dog.

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  • The idea that your husband loves anything more than you is just plain silly.

  • Isn't it?

  • After all, he took you for better or for worse, for sickness and in health. He forsook all others and he let you pick the colors for the reception. He puts up with your mother and is respectful towards your father.

  • And his dog was chewing on the upholstery in his truck while all of this was happening.

  • But, of course he loves you. Look how happy he is in the wedding photos with you, his mother the truck and the dog. He loves his truck and his mother. He loves his dog. He loves you. No problems there.

  • Let me cut to the chase: You may want to reassess your relationship if your dog's name is on the mail box above yours.

  • There are a few other indicators that puppy love may be an issue:

    • He bought both you and the dog the same style of hair brush. It's a nice hairbrush and it cost him half a day's wage. But they are exactly ... the ... same.

    • You get your hamburger flame broiled to order — medium rare, slathered with his special heirloom barbecue sauce. The dog, however, got steak.

    • Does he take you out to your favorite restaurant? Of course he does. He may bring candles and his grandfather's antique lighter. Then he orders something from the expensive side of the menu to-go — for Poochy.

    • You find a receipt for the local jewelry store while you are innocently snooping in his wallet. With a little research, you discover that he has ordered a lovely solid silver chain with a beautiful gem, engraved with your husband's name and telephone number in case of emergency — in the dog's size.

    • If you are not alert and on top of your game, the dog will call shotgun before you will. And he will get it.

    • Your hubby calls you from a business trip after having been gone a week and asks in a comical, deep radio-man voice if he may speak to Mr. Pooters.

    • Your better-half has created anniversary and special occasion alerts on his e-mail. Three of the five are for Zippy.

    • He is willing to go the extra mile, literally, to shop at the all-natural earth store for the dog's birthday, but gets you cake at Giganto Mart.

    • He has a special ring tone of "Dogs of War," by Pink Floyd set up just in case Max develops opposable thumbs because "You can never be too sure or too safe."

    • He bought an Apple watch and you had to ask who it was for.

    • Your guy has to make a wild guess why you are crying, but he knows each of the dog's barks and whines, what they stand for, and is ready for action at the drop of a beef bow-wow biscuit.

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  • Here is the thing about love for all of you dog widows: Love is not mutually exclusive. There is room in a heart for a heck of a lotta love, and it can be spread out all over the place.

  • In fact, those who are considered kind and loving are considered such by lots of people, people who have seen that love in action — not just one or two and a dog. Love begets love, and there is plenty to spare.

  • There are, however, ways of dealing with this relationship that save your pretty face without giving up important ground:

  • 1. Always look him in the eye — not your husband, the dog. They can sense fear.

  • 2. Don't skimp on the quality of his dinner — the husband and the dog. They have ways to get even. Speaking of immature retaliation,

  • 3. If one of them has perpetual gas, they go on the couch — both.

  • Is it such a bad thing that he loves his dog? No. In fact, it's kinda cute.

  • Kinda.

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Davison Cheney attended a university to became proficient in music and theater, preparing him to be unemployed and to over-react. Check out his blog davisoncheneymegadad.blogspot.com

Website: http://davisoncheneymegadad.blogspot.com

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